While surfing the internets, I found this list of drummer jokes that someone has maliciously edited into bass player jokes. These are the worst ones. This is not funny at all. This is the sort of thing that gives guitarists a bad name.
Q: How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb? A: Only one - but the guitarist has to show him first.
Gluing up a white pine body core with a maple center block
White pine is the low-grade cheap stuff you find at most home centers. Although strong enough for most things, it is very soft and prone to surface damage. White pine is also prone to dark marks from pitch. These can turn up inside pieces that otherwise looked clean.