While surfing the internets, I found this list of drummer jokes that someone has maliciously edited into bass player jokes. These are the worst ones. This is not funny at all. This is the sort of thing that gives guitarists a bad name.
Q: How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb? A: Only one - but the guitarist has to show him first.
There have been gigantic strides in adhesives in the last 50 years. Modern wood glues in particular are far superior to the animal-based glues of old times. When I see 'luthiers' insisting that you must use Hide Glue, I have to laugh. Tone Glue? Seriously? Here are the most useful adhesives if you are building a guitar: